The Slick Adventures of Downtown Girl

All Sorted Out

Saturday, February 03, 2007 | posted by Kate | permalink | |

So R came over here and we talked about things.

He was kind of freaking out on me, team.
So I gave him choices. I was calm. I did not cry.

Choice 1: We scale things back, only seeing each other a couple of times a week, but he has to let me know when that is so that I am not freaking out. I don't cling if my expectations are managed. I'm still his girlfriend and we're still together but we take a HUGE step back in terms of how much time we're spending together, and see how it goes.

Choice 2: We take a break. We keep in touch but we see other people. I made it clear that I want to have a boyfriend who wants to be with me and who wants to see me a few times a week, and he is not doing me any favors by staying with me if that guy is NOT him.

Choice 3: We break up completely and don't contact each other. When I said this, his whole face crumpled. This was clearly not something he even wanted to go near.

He wanted choice #1. He wanted me to be his girlfriend still. He told me that he loved me and that he wanted to be with me but that it is a new thing for him to be with someone who loves him back. He clearly has some things he needs to work out within himself, and that's okay. He switched my calendar to february for me and unloaded my dishwasher (hey, it's hard on crutches!).

I love him already and want to give him this chance. Perhaps it is a mistake to do so, but I am going to do it anyhow. If he decides later on that he doesn't want to be with me, that he doesn't want to be here with me, I will understand that. I have taken a big step back because of his hesitation.